I’ve tried quite hard to be enthused about the world cup, but with less than 48 hours to go, I’m sad to say it’s still not quite happening for me. Maybe once the piping-hot contents of Qatar vs Ecuador are ingested into my football stomach on Sunday afternoon, all reservations will be lost amidst a cavalcade of out-of-season tournament football delight.

It seems unlikely though. For all the obvious reasons. 6,500+ dead migrant workers during the construction process? Check. Dreadful human rights record? Check. Appalling LGBTQ+ rights record? Check. The whole idea of having a World Cup in the desert at the wrong time of year? Check.

And yet here we are, on the cusp of it all. I’ll probably watch as much as I can, with whatever time I can scrape between work, commuting and kids. Will I feel bad about it? Yes. Am I a massive hypocrite to talk about things like dead migrants & human rights, whilst being a mostly tacit enabler of the corruption that’s brought it all about? Yes.

It’s my hope that the footballers will be able to protest some of these things, and in such a way that the TV cameras cannot avoid. I don’t know who the matchday TV directors are going to be or where they’ll be from, but I’m almost certain they will be under strict orders to cut away from images that might upset the ruling class of the host nation.

This may be the most sportswashingy international tournament we’ve seen, but unlike the rebel cricket tours of apartheid South Africa in the 80’s, the players taking part aren’t willingly taking dirty money in full knowledge that years of their international careers are going to be pissed away. Some players have consciences, and I hope those that do are able to use their platform to make some kind of statement to push for change, to push for human rights and workers rights and LGBTQ+ rights. A message in support of those things not only for those who have suffered and died, and continue to suffer because of in Qatar, but for the whole world to see: that not only tolerance, but acceptance and celebration of them is a good thing and something worth striving for.

Today’s feeling: Sad, guilty and out in the groups.